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John and Barb's testimony, 5 of 6, hard times

8/30/2025

Hi all,

I ended last week with Chris sitting up in his bed about age 5, sitting and talking for the first time. He soon began walking with the aid of a walker and braces that were molded plastic which fit under his foot, heel, and up the back of his calf. He wasn't totally healed, but he became manageable.

Chris would see children on TV running and say things like: "When I get to heaven I'm going to run like that." Every night when he is home and we put him to bed I say; 'By His stripes...' and Chris responds; 'I was healed'. But he has been robbed the ability to understand time in terms of something happened 2000 years ago affecting him now. When he was 21 he was very excited one day as he came crawling down the hallway 'army man' style: "Dad! Dad! Know what Jesus said to me? He said He's going to walk through the mountains with me, yep, yahoo, that's what he said (laughing, giggling in excitement), He's going to walk through the mountains with me (laughing in excitement)...."

In between times I've had the Lord visit me to explain why people with long term or chronic conditions or illnesses find it difficult to be healed - that visitation came with Jesus standing on my left as I was seated, and Chris on my right in his wheelchair. Chris is content to wait for heaven, he doesn't have the mental capacity to 'believe' for healing, and we as parents rest in that, for we cannot override his will nor impart to him higher knowledge about faith.

Heart for ministry, but have to feed my family:Pizza delivery
In 1984 we began attending a church that soon asked me to become the Associate pastor, but they couldn't pay me. But I had started a pizza delivery restaurant and was paid from that.

The promise was the pastor was going to sell his businesses and retire, promoting me to Senior Pastor, with full pay. I began holding Monday afternoon 'healing school' meetings. Always 15-20 would come, we'd sit in a circle, and I'd teach 1 point of healing each week. During that time I began moving in the manifestation of the Spirit the Bible calls the discerning of spirits. With my eyes wide open I saw the natural world, but I would also see in the Lord's realm at the same time. Sometimes I would know a person's motives for something they claimed, but most often I saw in the Lord's realm.

I would see a tongue of fire on someone, for instance.
They were always about 18" tall (46cm) with lots of little tongues of fire all over it, hovering over a person's head. Then I would see and hear the Father's words to them, or a shaft of light upon someone, and see and hear the Father's words to them. Sometimes this would happen for many in each meeting. In April the Lord visited me for the first time, during a Sunday morning service. It was the first time I saw Him, which is described in Pursuing the Seasons of God, so I won't go into detail here.

But it is important to know these spiritual things were going on April through the whole summer, for in June of 1986 the pastor and his wife sat in our living room saying he had changed his mind; he wasn't going to retire, and there was no future for me with them. I saw in the Spirit a giant hand like a karate chop come down between he and his wife and Barb and me. We knew we were released. But we continued serving the church as if nothing had changed, realizing spiritually we had been released, but in the natural nothing had changed.

There is a huge lesson in that.
Many people will sense the time at their job has ended in their spirit, but instead of waiting for the Lord to open the next door, they quit, and then wonder why they suffer lack. Just because the cloud lifts off that job doesn't mean it is time to go just yet. He uses the time in between the time the grace ends and the cloud moves on to grow you in patience, grace, and consistency. If you don't learn the lesson He will put you in a position later where you have another opportunity to grow. You have to wait until the cloud moves away, not just when you sense it lifting. Do what is right in the natural by applying and updating resume and such, but don't move until that next door opens.

This was a very difficult time for us. I knew the Lord was going to move me back into full time ministry, but I didn't know where. He was visiting me and teaching me things, but financially and in direction of life, it was very hard. In October of that year, 1986, the Lord appeared to me while on a short term trip to Mexico (sent by the church), that changed my life forever. Again, that is shared in Pursuing the Seasons of God. (email me for a PDF of it and I'll send it to you.)

During this time we sold the pizza store, were left in debt to the IRS, and sought lawyers for Chris's brain injury. The full ramifications of raising a child who was mentally retarded and physically disabled sunk in. That summer and fall of 1986 was very difficult for Barb especially. Jesus visiting me, but no healing for her first born son. Lawyers looked at the records from the hospital and told us it was clearly negligence and they felt a 7 figure award. We had lawyers telling us we'd have a multi-million dollar settlement, Jesus visiting me and opening my eyes to His realm, we had no money and were selling personal items in weekly garage sales just to eat and pay for Chris' therapies, our time at that church had ended but we had no place to go...and more. We just couldn't do it all, and we backed out of the lawsuit.

After 8 months of this, on Sunday, February 1, 1987 the Lord told me:
"Prepare to move by the end of the month." We obeyed, putting what we had left into boxes, waiting. 2 Sundays later a call came to the church (because our phone had been disconnected), about pastoring a church in southeast Colorado. My spirit leapt and we made arrangements for me to visit. It was a dusty little farming town, out on the prairie of eastern Colorado, but our spirits leapt and we knew it was Him.

We had been using a borrowed car, but were moving 2 1/2 hours away, so we needed a car of our own. We talked and prayed about our need:A 4 door car, automatic transmission, air conditioning, good shape, and big enough for all 5 of us. A day later I drove by a used car on my way to somewhere, and my spirit leapt, so I turned around and went in. Among the many cars was an older white 4 door 1977 Chevy Impala, but it looked to be in good shape though 10 years old. The owner of the lot came over and we talked about it, and I said I'd like to buy it, but needed to make payments.

He told me it was owned by a lady in his church and he was doing her a favor selling it on consignment. It turned out that woman was a mutual friend who knew me from our previous church. My terms were that I had no money down, and could not start payments for 90 days, but I'd need the car right away. She prayed for a day, felt in her spirit that it was the Lord, and called the church to tell them to tell me she would sell the car to me.

The lesson was that even God can't move a parked car. We prayed, specified our need, then I started looking for a car. We do what we know to do in the natural, and then He moves. We can see this in Jesus making the thousands sit in groups of 50's and 100's, then He multiplied loaves and fish. He had them locate and fill the 6 water pots, then He turned water into wine.

Moving...
We moved March 1, 1987. We moved into a small house next to the church, and by small I mean a square house, 2 bedrooms, 1 bath, with a foundation that was failing to the extent when our youngest son's bottle fell to the floor, it rolled toward the center of the house. Our first service we had 7 people. A couple weeks later we had 10 and we rejoiced at breaking into double figures! Through our nearly 6 years there, we went through 4 buildings as we grew, and had a many programs in outreach to the community.

All this time Barb and I continued to think through the Word of Faith movement, for we saw the good, which was the integrity of God's Word, but we felt very separated from those who had gotten off-balance. Having a handicapped son, being poor, having turned down several opportunities in the business world that would have made us wealthy, we didn't fit the image of a Word of Faith pastor. We were too busy clinging to the Lord to care, but it did mean losing some friends.

Poverty a mentality, not a bank account
On the one hand God was moving mightily in our midst, and the Lord was visiting us regularly, teaching me so many things. But in the natural we were dirt poor, living offering to offering. Barb was approached by some young mothers about getting on welfare, food stamps, and free milk and cheese from the government for low income families.

To her credit Barb recognized poverty is a mindset not a bank account. She declined it all, saying she would trust the Father for our needs, including the milk, cheese, and other food that those charity programs offered.

I can say that in our time there we never lacked. But we still felt alone, alienated from Word of Faith and friends, focusing on the core of our walk with the Father and Lord. One January the church struggled to pay our rent, and the left over money for us as my pay was $15. Fifteen dollars, that's not a typo. But He provided....

How He provided, and return to Tulsa, the buckle of the Bible belt, next week. Until then, blessings,
John Fenn
cwowi.org

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John and Barb's testimonies, 4 of 6, crisis of faith, Jesus visits

8/23/2025

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Hi all,

We were married in September 1978 and the following March (1979), Barb became pregnant with Chris. In May with her 3 months pregnant and suffering all the sickness, emotions and nausea that comes with the first trimester, we drove west across the USA from Charlotte, North Carolina to Tulsa, Oklahoma. (1020 miles/1640km) I drove a rented moving truck and she followed, driving our little car. It was not a fun trip, complete with stops so Barb could vomit on the side of the road with threats to go back to her mom in between the dry heaves, lol.

Before leaving Charlotte we had expressed to the Father that we didn't want to live in an apartment as Chris would be born in December. We asked if we could rent a house, and He replied to me:"You may rent a house...and after that I'll give you a ranch." Lesson learned. The ranch didn't happen for another 19 years. He has a way of leaving large gaps of time between promises.

As our habit was and is, we wrote down our needs on paper,
Even at age 22 we had discerned the honesty required when praying, making a distinction between need and desire. That requires an honest discussion within your own heart. If you tell the Father you need something when it's really a desire, He won't always answer, especially if that desire is born of lust/greed. If the desires are righteous, we have found He will often answer. Psalm 37:4 says He gives us the desires of the heart, not the lusts of the heart. They must be righteous desires, usually directly connected to an expressed need. Philippians 4:19 says He provides our needs according to His riches in heaven.

The needs were; 3 bedrooms (1 for us, 1 for the baby, 1 for our parents to visit), at least 1 full bath and a second bath for the other 2 bedrooms, a garage for the car, appliances except for washer and dryer. We would buy those once there.

Under desires we wrote earth tones color scheme, carpet not hardwood or tile floor, fireplace, window over the kitchen sink. We submitted both lists to the Father, and took authority over the devil to forbid him from messing anything up, and asked the Father to send His angels to do what they needed to do. Quietly, internally, after we had prayed, I said to myself but later also to Barb; "It would be nice to have a garden started since we'll be there in springtime. (May).

Once in Tulsa we made an appointment to look at a house for lease. As we were driving to that appointment my eyes fell upon a sign that said 'For lease' in front of a home to my left. My spirit leapt and I slammed on the brakes. "This is it. This is the house the Father has for us." We determined it was right and proper to keep our appointment to the other house, and we did. Going there confirmed it was 'dead' in our spirits, no life there, so we knew we were to rent the other house. We did, and it had all we had put on our list of needs AND desires - earth tones, carpet, fireplace, window over the sink.

The house even had a garden growing out back, and we were thrilled. A few days later when we moved in, everything was clean and perfect, but the garden had been mowed down to the ground. I was stunned. "What happened?" I asked the Father, and that day I learned yet another lesson:

"You didn't think enough of me to include a garden in your prayer, (though I provided it) so it was left unprotected, and the devil moved the people to destroy it."

Grace comes first, which is a revelation from the Father or Lord. Faith is our response to that grace/revelation. When the Father said; "You may rent a house in Tulsa", that was the grace/revelation. As Jesus said in John 15:7, when He speaks to a person, they may ask what they want pertaining to what He spoke, and it will be done.

For example, Noah received the revelation of the flood and command to build the boat, so whatever he would have needed for that task would be provided. We received the command we could rent a house, so we should have responded to that grace/revelation with enough faith to include the garden. Oh me of little faith.

December 1979, Chris is born a 'blue baby'.
After over 15 hours of labor, Chris was born by emergency C-section, with the cord wrapped around his neck. For those who know such things, his APGAR score was 4. We didn't know anything, being 1st time parents. At 4 months my mother noticed something wasn't right with his muscle tone, but we dismissed her comments. But at 6 months he could not sit up normally, he was like a rag doll, and hadn't spoken a word.

In June of 1980 Barb took Chris to a doctor (6 months old). We had moved to the Boulder, Colorado area and had no family and were just beginning to make friends at the church we attended, City on the Hill, Pastor Steve Shank. Good church, good pastors. The doctor told Barb that Chris had cerebral palsy (CP), which is brain damage during labor and/or delivery. He told her to put him in a home 'and forget you ever had him'. He said there was no reason we couldn't go on and have normal children, so put this one in a home and forget we ever had him.

Barb called me at work in tears and just devastated. That night we gave 6 month old Chris a bath, laid him on a fluffy bathmat to dry him off, and laid hands on him, rejecting the doctor's diagnosis and advice, commanding Chris to be healed. But...when Chris was almost 5 years old he still had never sat up, never spoken a word, and could only roll like a log across the floor, pushing himself with his arms to change direction.

One night while I was working late, Barb reached her breaking point.
Chris was upstairs in a crib though he was nearly 5, because he would roll right out of a regular bed. She poured her heart out in tears to the Father, begging for healing, begging for answers. Suddenly she heard from upstairs:"Mommy! Mommy, look!" She ran upstairs and Chris was sitting up in his bed, and talking. It was truly a miracle, and for whatever reason, was only a partial healing.

Chris has barely stopped talking since, lol, for he keeps a running commentary on truck, cars, trains, people, anything going on around us. He has never met a stranger or dog that he doesn't like. Mentally he is about age 4, but understands some things beyond that.

Back in 1984-85
Many 'Word of Faith' people were questioning if it was 'against your faith' to go to a doctor, to have insurance, to take medicines, and so on. Chris's (new) doctor had prescribed physical therapy, occupational therapy, and speech therapy for him. Chris was now 6 years old, talkative, but needed help saying some letters.

I went to the Lord on this one, since it was His stripes that bought healing as part of the atonement. He told me this:"It isn't 'against your faith' for the therapies work with healing, not against it." I asked what He meant. "They cause body parts to move as they were designed, so they are working with healing, not against it." I asked for chapter and verse and He replied:"Do you not understand why I told the man with the withered arm to stretch it out, or the lame to take up their bed and walk? (Mark 3:1-5, 2:1-12)

We've learned so many lessons about the ways of the Lord during our journey. I hope by sharing these you too may know His ways. Next week, Chris' desire for heaven rather than healing, and time gaps between His promises, and more! Until then, blessings,

John Fenn
cwowi.org and email me at [email protected] or [email protected]

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John and Barb's testimonies, 3 of 6, Barb gets saved

8/16/2025

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Hi all,

Leading Barb to the Lord
Barb and I genuinely liked each other from the start. We make each other laugh, and we laugh alot, even now after all these years. We love nature, and spent many dates talking of building a life together, children, discipline and all the things a young couple should talk about as they get to know one another. One of those things I talked to her about was the Lord.

Many of our dates, for the first 6 months especially, were us sitting on a sofa in her basement, with me countering every argument she had against believing in God. She was an atheist when I met her, and worse, she was into some very dark things. But over the fall and winter of 1974-75 she had seen the Father's presence in my life, and about Jesus. One day when she was all alone she said:"God, if you're real, and what John says about you is true, then you better prove yourself now...." She said immediately there came a cloud, a saturating presence of His unconditional love upon her, and she knew that she knew Jesus and the Father were real. She never looked back. She has had a heart for righteousness, repentance, and holiness from the start, and is as zealous now as she was then.

The summer I graduated from high school (Barb was a year behind) me and 2 other guys went to a lake cabin for a fasting retreat to baptize each other in the lake. It was that weekend I first heard the voice of the Lord. The Father had spoken to me many times, but I had never heard Jesus before. The last song on one side of Nancy Honeytree's 'Evergreen' album had a song written by Larry Norman, entitled; I am your servant.

I struggled with self-image, and couldn't believe the Lord could ever use me for anything.
I put my life on the altar so to speak, yet again, asking Him to use me if He wanted, though privately I didn't see how that could be. As "I Am Your Servant" was ending like a loud speaker in my whole being He said:"I love you John." I was so startled I responded:"I, I, I love you too Lord." "Turn to John 14:27." "Now Lord?" "Yes, now."

I did:"Peace I leave with you; Not as the world gives, give I unto you. Don't let your hearts be troubled, nor fearful." I knew at that moment, as impossible as it sounded, He had accepted my offer to serve Him in any way He wished.

Both Barb's family and mine had ties to Indiana University so where we went to school was pretty much predetermined. In August of 1977 I was starting my sophomore year there, and Barb was just starting her freshman year. I lived in a fraternity and she in a dorm, separated about 3 miles (4.8km). In September she was in my room as we prayed about our futures. We now knew we were called into ministry and a 4 year degree held no allure, but we were being obedient to our parents.

As we prayed she saw a vision of herself standing with the Lord facing mountains.
He put each hand on her shoulders and turned her around to see the prairie before them. It was full of wheat, and each head of wheat was a human face. At the same time I was prophesying what He was telling me. He said He wanted us to go to Boulder, Colorado, which is at the foot of the Rocky Mountains. He also said:"Your dad will cut off the money over Christmas break. I want you to spend time fasting and praying, and I will teach you many things." Then privately to me He said:"You may be married next year at this time."

She left my fraternity at 12:30a, and I walked her to the door then watched until she left the house property, stepping into the street and onto a sidewalk. She called when she got to her dorm, excited, for she said 2 big angels walked her home. She said they were wearing baggy pants and robes, and people went way around her when she came upon someone walking on the same sidewalk. She said the second she put her hand on the door to her dorm, they left.

Just as the Lord had said, dad cut off the money at Christmas break. I found myself living at home in January 1978 a 19 year old college dropout, fasting, praying, attending prayer meetings, laying hands on anyone with any need of healing. The Lord had focused on teaching me about healing during that time, and I became known as the 'guru' of the neighborhood. Barb continued to finish out her freshman year at Indiana University. By February my mom was very frustrated with me, a healthy and hungry 19 year old fasting and praying, and she went to the Lord 2x in those 90 days, and each time He told her, "Be patient. It is of Me."

In March, sensing my time of fasting and prayer was drawing to a close, I proposed to Barb, and we set a September wedding date, according to the Word of the Lord 6 months earlier. So there I was, unemployed, without a car, living at home with my mom, and set to be married in 6 months. Barb's parents thought we were nuts, mom observed.

In April mom came home from a prayer meeting at church and said;
"The Lord spoke to me. You're supposed to fly to Tulsa, Oklahoma." She got on the phone with her travel agent, and arranged a flight for the next morning. It happened that fast. I flew out with $9 in my pocket (all my money in the world) and my mom's credit card. I rented a car, found a motel, and the only 2 things I had heard of in Tulsa was Oral Roberts University (ORU) and a Bible school called Rhema, which had started 4 years earlier. I applied for a job at ORU but felt a heavy hand becoming ever heavier as I continued writing on the application, so I didn't complete it, and walked out of the office. I then went to Rhema, where they were taping a TV show with a teacher named Kenneth Hagin and I sat in on that as part of the audience. I knew nothing of Rhema.

That night with no direction and down to $7 in my pocket I got down on my knees and prayed, asking the Father what He wanted me to do. I saw a vision as if I was hovering above a river being blocked by a set of gates. The gates then opened and a rush of water flowed out, and floating on the water were the letters spelling 'Charlotte.' Then it ended. I called mom and asked what was in Charlotte, and she said it is in North Carolina and there was a ministry there called 'The PTL Club'. She said our neighbor Betty had told her earlier in the day she had been vaccuming her house when the Lord stood at the end of her vaccum cleaner and said:"I'm sending John to The PTL Club." Mom said, 'Charge it', and the next day I was on a plane from Tulsa for Charlotte. Working there would put me about a 15 hour car drive from home.

I walked into the employment office at The PTL Club and told the woman the Lord had told me to come there, and she looked at me like she had heard that about 1,000 times before. She said there was a hiring freeze and they weren't hiring. But still, I asked what job to apply for, and looking at me like 'didn't you hear what I said', but said:"Go over there and pray about it", as she pointed across the room to a table. I did, and the Father said:"Put down 'Tour Guide'." So I did, and walked back over to her.

She looked like she had seen a ghost.
She said; "While you were over there the Lord spoke to me and told me to hire you. Wait just a minute." She disappeared into the office for a few minutes, then came back saying she had just gotten word they were hiring 2 tour guides. That led me into an immedate interview. Then they saw my major at Indiana University was "Recreation and Parks Administration", which got me a to 2nd interview with the Director and Assistant Director of the "Heritage USA" part of the ministry.

It was a large development which is today occupied by other ministries. Back then it had a campground, amphitheater, cabins around a lake, and so on. I was hired on May 8, 1978 as a 'Park Ranger.' Putting 'Tour Guide' got me in the door, and I learned about the ways of the Lord. He is shrewd and wise in business. Putting down 'Park Ranger' would not have gotten me the job, but all the Lord intended by me applying for Tour Guide was just to open the door for His real intention.

Through the years I've learned He would have me take a job that wasn't what I knew He had for me. But I've learned by experience quite often He needed me to get hired, so once hired He could move me to where He wanted me to be all along - but He has to work with the free wills of people. Many Christians turn down jobs the Lord led them to because it wasn't what they thought He wanted, not realizing He was just trying to get them hired so He could move them once on the job.

Why Tulsa?
August of 1978 was a month before our wedding, and I was in prayer as the Father taught me about being a husband, how to treat my wife, and so on. Almost as an afterthought He added:"By the way, the reason I sent you to Tulsa is I want you to go to Rhema next year." I was stunned, as I had wondered why I had gone to Tulsa a few months earlier in April.

I called my mom immediately, who happened to be having lunch with a friend she hadn't seen in weeks. She told her friend what the Lord told me and she replied:"Last night when I was praying, the Lord told me He is sending John to Bible school and He wants me to pay for it. Tell him to send me a letter of acceptance and I'll pay for the whole year." (I did, she did)

Barb and I were married in September of 1978, knowing by the next summer we would have to move to Tulsa. But that year at The PTL Club was a good 'newlywed year. We started our life together a full day's drive from our parents, which was very healthy, lol.

Next week; Chris being born with brain damage, and a miracle or two along the way.
Until then, blessings,
John Fenn
cwowi.org and email me at [email protected] or [email protected]

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John and Barb's testimonies, 2 of 6, Meeting Barb

8/9/2025

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Hi all,

Divorce causes children to think all sorts of things.
Dad's leaving affected all 4 of us kids in different ways. We were 11, 9, 7, 5, and fit the roles of children so often associated with dysfunctional families:We were hero, clown, scapegoat, and baby sister was the mascot, in that order. But privately, in my heart, I sought a father. My life had just fallen apart. Our circle of friends included a boy my age, Emerson, still a good friend, and another, Trip, still a friend, and each of their families were gracious enough to include me in many family activities. Trip's parents were known to us as 'Uncle Del and Aunt Betsy', we were that close.

All my friends had dads who were active in their lives, and I felt very self-conscious and alone. When dad said "I'm divorcing your mother and you kids" the context through which we had understood the world crumbled. I didn't care about school. I dropped out of Boy Scouts, art lessons, drum lessons, swimming lessons (my teacher wanted me to train competitively), and later I dropped out of SCUBA instruction and flying lessons. I just didn't care any longer. I was stuck in apathy for life, in my heart, wanting a father.

When I was 14 I saw a little monkey for sale in the pet shop at the mall, and really wanted her. She was the smallest of the several for sale, and the most frail and cowering of the group, clinging to the other monkeys - she was like me emotionally. I identified with her. Back in the early 1970's you could buy exotic pets in pet stores. Mom realized I was hurting and she told me later she thought caring for her would bring some healing, and she was right.

Tilly is what I named her, and with a large cage a neighbor had built (another father figure of a friend), Tilly and I became inseparable. I quickly potty trained her to her cage, and with her harness and leash, she and I would go outside. She loved to be in the trees, and at night, eating moths and beetles that flew around the porch light.

Looking back I can see the Father's hand providing all those dads of my friends and Tilly.
She gave me something to live for. I only had her for about a year. She died on my lap on the way to the Veterinarian. He later reported she had a congenital condition in her intestines that got knotted up as she aged, which eventually caused her death. A few weeks later I turned 15 (May).

It was now 1973, the start of my sophomore year, the start of Barb's freshman year. I was apathetic as ever, getting an F in my first semester of algebra, and still looking for a father. I was taking German class which was the 1 class I was very enthusiastic about as I had almost been born in Germany. My dad was stationed near Stuttgart 1957-58, and mom came home to have me, dad's discharge came around the same time. Back then 2 years of military service was mandatory for young men. When mom and dad wanted to say things they didn't want we kids to hear, they would switch to German, so I really wanted to learn it.

In German class I met Janny, a Roman Catholic. (Still a very good friend) We paired up on class projects and became good friends. One day we were comparing churches - she Roman Catholic and me Episcopalian - we realized our Sunday morning services used the same liturgy. She made the comment:"I know the God behind the liturgy." That intrigued me. I wanted to know the Father God, but was unsure. I watched as her boyfriend, Vic (and future husband) and she prayed about things in their lives, and they all got answered, one by one. After watching all those answered prayers, I gave my heart to the Lord and the Father.

I was standing at home in my bedroom on a day I made sure everyone was out of the house, when I said out loud:Jesus, if you have the last word in my life, then it only makes sense to serve you now. No matter what anyone may think of me, as long as you have the last word and are for me, then I give you my life, do with me as you will." and words to the effect.

Meeting Barb at age 15
While the Father was drawing me to Jesus when I was 15 through Janny, in September of 1973, my 10th grade, Barb's next door neighbor and best friend, Margaret, asked me to their school's fall prom. I was 15 so couldn't drive yet, so mom dropped me at their house and Margaret's dad took me home that night.

Mom rented me a powder blue tuxedo - it was the early 1970's so the shirt had ruffles. I had an afro that came naturally from my long curly hair. It had turned more blonde than red by then, and braces had taken care of my buck teeth.

Being next door neighbors, Barb was at Margaret's to see us dressed in our prom best. She had just turned 15 and had gotten the braces off her teeth as she started 9th grade. I don't remember Margaret's dress, but Barb was wearing a maroon sweat shirt and blue jeans, and was as smart alecky as ever:"Ooo Margaret, he's hot. Ooo Margaret, he's tall. Ooo Margaret whatchagonna do? and things like that. I had gone from that chubby dork of a 12 year old with buck-teeth, in an ugly wool green suit, to a tall, thin, 15 year old with long hair that resembled the afro of the early 1970's. No dork here! lol.

I never had another date with Margaret
Yes, puberty changes icky girls and dorky boys, and once I met Barb that was game, set, and match. Margaret and I saw each other through the school year regularly through church, but Barb and I didn't see each other again until the next summer.

That summer, 1974, Margaret (16) and Barb (15), bicycled the 4 miles from their neighborhood out to my house to see me. Another 4 miles west I knew of a creek that was flooded and we had the idea to go float down it. We all cycled there as it ran through a country club golf course so the banks of the creek were manicured, making it easy to climb out, walk upstream and float back all over again. Looking back, it was a miracle we didn't drown. We knew enough to keep our legs up close to us as we floated so we wouldn't become entangled in underwater branches, but wow that was stupid.

There were other bike rides together that summer, but the turning point came in late summer when Barb broke her nose. I got my driver's license that summer and drove in to go swimming in one of Barb and Margaret's friend's swimming pool. There were probably about 10 of us, and the pool had not been cared for, so the water was solid green. But who cared? We had floated down a flooded creek a couple weeks earlier, so what if you couldn't see your hand in front of your face?

But it was there in that murk that a mutual friend, Kim, (still a good friend) accidentally kicked Barb in the nose, breaking it. Everyone dispersed as Barb's parents took her to the doctor. I really liked Barb, but was so shy that up to that point I wasn't brave enough to let my feelings be known. I didn't feel the Lord directing me to Barb, but in a crowd of people, she was the one I wanted to hang out with and get to know better. We clicked from the start.

I was able to buy my own car:
A 1965 GTO with Thrush mufflers and a Hurst shifter. (That will only mean something to a few of you I know). You could hear me coming from blocks away. I was genuinely concerned about Barb, but very shy. Wanting to let her know I liked her, but not brave enough to drive to her house by myself, I grabbed my friend, Tony Cooke, to take with me. Barb was embarrassed as her nose was taped with white tape across the bridge of her nose and across part of her face, but she could see that I liked her, though she wondered my intentions because I was so shy. Maybe she still saw some of that dork in me. She was still 15, I was barely 16.

A couple weeks later she was better, and I summoned the nerve to ask her out on a date. We went to a movie, and not wanting the night to end, as we drove by a Dunkin' Donut shop I asked if she'd like a donut. We pulled in, I used the last of my cash, and sat talking for quite a while. That night I walked her to her door, and because I am 6'6" tall (1.9m) and she is only 5'3 1/2 (1.6m), she stood one step up at her back door, and we kissed goodnight.

She later said she knew she was going to marry me at that moment. She said she floated into her house. I was the first guy she had dated that opened the door for her, didn't try to push myself on her, and took a genuine interest in just being with her. A couple weeks later as I fumbled with my words and my class ring - I was trying to ask her to 'go steady' - she finally just grabbed the ring and said, "Are you trying to ask me to go steady? Yes!" Direct as ever, lol, but we've been 'going steady' since. We were married 4 years later, in September of 1978, my how time flies.

Next week, Barb gets saved, and we gain experience in the gifts of the Spirit. Until then, blessings,
John Fenn
cwowi.org and email me at [email protected] and [email protected]

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John and Barb's testimonies, 1 of 6, The dork

8/2/2025

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Hi all,

It's been on my heart to share some of our testimony, experiences we had in the Lord, and good and bad decisions we made so others may learn.

Barb and I have known each other since we were kids
Our parents were part of the same social group and knew each other when we were growing up in the mid-1960's, so they all had children the same ages. Additionally, my grandfather was their family's doctor, and lived just 2 blocks from Barb and her family.

Being in the same social group meant Barb and I were at the same birthday parties growing up with mutual friends. My memory of her only goes back to about age 8. But she was an 'icky girl' back then, so I didn't pay attention to her.

Fast forward to age 12. Barb's best friend was Margaret who lived next door and went to the same church I did. (She is still a very good friend) Barb went to a different church. So Margaret and I were friends as well, but I didn't know Barb yet, she was just in the same social circle.

Barb and Margaret were quite mischievous, known throughout my grandparent's neighborhood. On Sundays after church we would often go to my grandparents house for Sunday dinner, and very often Barb and Margaret would be playing outside. My grandparents considered them naughty girls and they did not allow me to go outside to play with them. But I saw them through windows. It's important to understand Barb was the surprise her mother had at age 40, not really wanted, and her sister and brother are 9 and 12 years older than her. Barb's parents started drinking in the morning and drank until late at night. There was much dysfunction and abuse in that home and she was very unhappy.

My parents had built a house out in the country, about 4 miles (6.4km) west of Barb's neighborhood in a different school district than Barb. I'm the oldest of 4 and my dad had inherited his father's and grandfather's funeral home. Back in that day the Fenn Funeral Home also ran the ambulance service, so we always had a separate phone line in the house. When that phone would ring everything had to be silenced as if dad was at the office, and he put on his 'office voice' to answer the phone:"Fenn funeral home, how may I help you." Once dad hung up we could resume play or watching TV or talk.

Dad was a disciplinarian and went to our Episcopal (Anglican) church because it was good for business, mom went because she believed. We lived in a split-level home, which means the downstairs had a door to the outside ground level. Dad had a workshop in the basement and there he cut our hair. We 3 boys could have any hairstyle we liked as long as it was a crew cut; we looked like Marines in basic training. Our sister was the baby of the family, and took full advantage of it.

Being the oldest of the 4 children I have good memories of my dad.
He taught me to shake hands firmly, shine my shoes, look people in the eye, and I somehow knew he was grooming me to take over the family business, or at least be successful in life. At the dinner table it was dad on one end commanding the meal, and mom on the other, we were 2 kids on each side. We sat up straight, kept one hand in our lap, and shared our school day in turn as if we were still in school giving a report to the class. But there were times of laughter around the table as well.

There were good times. Dad took us camping and taught me how to handle a knife, tie knots, build a fire and how to properly extinguish it. Before we would leave a camp we would 'police the camp boys', meaning we picked up every bit of trash. I once asked if I had to pick up someone's cigarette butt left on the ground and dad replied with a lesson I've lived by ever since:"Always leave anything you use or borrow in as good a shape as you received it, or better."

The divorce
Up until February of 1969, when I was 11 1/2, we had lived a privileged life. Dad had inherited a large yacht from his dad, kept north of us on Lake Michigan in Holland, Michigan. Mom had inherited her parent's summer cottage further north on Burt Lake, just about 25 miles (40km) south of Mackinaw Island. In summer we went between the two, one time dad even brought the big boat through canals and locks to Burt Lake. Dad taught me to sail on a little Sunfish the summer I turned 8, which was not much more than a surfboard with a sail. But he taught me how to set it up with the rudder and centerboard, and hoist the sail. He took me out and tipped it over and taught me how to right it. By age 8 I was given the freedom to sail anywhere on the lake as long as I could still see our cottage.

February 1969 changed everything. They set us down on the sofa, with mom and dad sitting opposite. Dad explained he and mom were getting divorced. We didn't know the meaning of the word as no one in our circle of friends had divorced parents. When my 5 year old sister asked what it meant, dad replied:"I won't be here for birthdays, holidays, Christmas. I'm leaving, I'm divorcing your mother and I'm divorcing you kids." It was taken as cruelly in our hearts as it sounds today when I type it, but I realize dad wasn't trying to be mean, he was just very analytical and that's how he saw it.

He was true to his word. My brothers and I stopped counting at about 23 broken promises. He would say he was going to see our little league ball game or say he was taking us to ice cream, but he never did. Dozens of times he had said to be ready at 4pm because he was coming to get us to go do something, and he never came.

For me, ages 12 to 16 were the hardest in my life. Rejected by my dad not just that once, but dozens of times reinforced through broken promises, I was searching for a father. I was angry at the injustice of it all. Why would he leave his 4 kids to raise his new wife's 2 kids as his own? My grades went from honor student to failing and near failing. I dropped out of everything because I no longer cared for anything. No drive, no ambition, no hope. Just going through the motions of being a kid pretending to care about a future.

At age 12 I was confirmed in the Episcopal church, along with Margaret, Barb's next door neighbor. Barb came with Margaret that Sunday and we met briefly on the steps in the church. She talked to me and I thought she was very pretty, but I was 12, red hair, overweight, buck teeth, and wearing the ugliest green wool suit you've ever seen. Barb said something to me and I just stuttered over my words, and she in her direct way said something like:"What's wrong with you dork, can't you talk?" as she turned to continue down the stairs. Ahh...my future wife, lol.

Barb's broken nose brought us together, and more next week. Until then, blessings,
John Fenn
cwowi.org and email me at [email protected] or [email protected]

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